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A BIBLICAL DEFINITION OF LOVE.
Two points: love is keeping the law. Love is unconditional.
Earlier this week, one of our members asked me whether I could
preach on LOVE. Perhaps his thoughts were already wandering to
St. Valentine's Day in three days' time.
Well, since I hadn't yet begun my sermon preparation, I decided
to tackle this subject today.
Now what this member wanted to know, I think, is what love
actually IS. What IS true love?
In the English language today, we use the word love very LOOSELY.
People love their country. They love ice-cream. They love their
wife. They love to swim. They even love to hate.
You will find also that people have many different ideas about
what love MEANS. Some have DIED for love. Some have MURDERED for
love. People have been BLINDED by love to do all sorts of things.
They have been JEALOUS for love. They have gone to WAR for love.
All this makes it DIFFICULT for people to get a clear idea of
what love really is.
* * * * * * * * * *
Now in the New Testament, there are FIVE words for love. There is
storge, for family affection. There is philia for friendship.
There is philanthropia, for humanitarianism. There is eros, for
sexual love. And finally, there is AGAPE (pronounced agaa-pei).
And AGAPE is the word we want to look at THIS MORNING, because
this is the word the New Testament uses to describe the special
character of CHRISTIAN love.
* * * * * * * * * *
What IS agape love?
It's interesting to see how the New Testament DESCRIBES agape
love. It says that when we love others with agape love, we are
loving them in the same way that GOD loves us. Agape love is ME
loving YOU in the same way that GOD loves ME.
We find this jumping out at us again and again when we turn the
pages of the New Testament. TRUE love is the same as GOD'S love
for us. TRUE love is the same as the love that CHRIST has for us.
Let's look at a few examples.
Jesus said, "A new commandment I give to you: Love one another.
As I have loved YOU, so you must love ONE ANOTHER." (John 13:35).
And he said, "My command is this: Love each other as I have loved
YOU." (John 15:12).
PAUL said, "Be imitators of God, therefore... and live a life of
love, just as Christ loved us." (Ephesians 5:2). And he said,
"Husbands, love your WIVES, just as Christ loved the Church and
gave Himself up for her." (Ephesians 5:25).
And JOHN said, "Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also
ought to love one another." (1 John 4:11).
True love, therefore, is the same as the love that GOD has for
you and me. The love that GOD has shown to you and me is the love
WE ought to show others.
* * * * * * * * * *
Now the Bible points out to us that when we love others with
agape love, we don't just try to COPY God. We don't just look at
the way God loves US and then try to do the same ourselves.
Agape love is far MORE than that. Agape love is the love of GOD
IN us. In fact agape love is God at work THROUGH us by His Holy
Spirit.
God LIVES in us. Therefore the love that a Christian has for
others does not come simply from himself. It is the love of GOD
at work THROUGH him.
Let's look again at some examples from the Word of God.
Jesus said, "Father... I have made You known to (those who
believe)... in order that the love You have for ME may be in THEM
and that I MYSELF may be in them." (John 17:26).
PAUL said, "God has poured out His love into our hearts by the
HOLY SPIRIT, whom He has given to us." (Romans 5:5).
And JOHN said, "No one has ever seen God; but if we love one
another, GOD lives IN us and His love is made COMPLETE in us." (1
John 4:12).
There are many more verses that I could quote, but these will do
to make CLEAR the Bible's teaching.
We are able to love others with agape love only because GOD lives
IN us. God lives out HIS life THROUGH us.
We don't just try to COPY the love of God. We don't just live by
His EXAMPLE. We love because the SPIRIT OF GOD controls us and
lives out HIS life THROUGH us.
* * * * * * * * * *
Thirdly, the Bible emphasises that agape love means first to OBEY
THE LAW OF gOD. NOT the old law of MOSES, but the law of LOVE
which we have through Jesus Christ.
Agape love is not just a feeling. It is not just an emotion that
sometimes comes over you. It goes far DEEPER than that.
The Bible teaches us that TRUE love is the fulfilling of the LAW.
In other words, the BEST way to love others is to obey the
commands of God. And as soon as you BREAK those commands, you are
no longer living in love.
We all know that GOD is the supreme Law-GIVER. God HIMSELF gave
us the law. And because agape love means God living THROUGH us,
it also means living according to His LAW.
Let us look again at the teaching of the Bible.
Jesus said, "If you LOVE Me, you will obey what I command." (John
14:15). And He said, "If anyone loves Me, He will obey My
teaching." (John 14:23).
PAUL said, "He who loves his fellowman has FULFILLED THE LAW."
(Romans 13:8). And he said, "Love does no harm to its neighbour.
Therefore love is the FULFILMENT of the law." (Romans 13:10).
JOHN said, "This is how we know that we love the children of God:
by loving God and carrying out His commandments." (1 John 5:2).
And He said, "This is love: that we walk in obedience to His
commands." (2 John 1:6).
To love means to OBEY to God's commands. This is what love is
above all else.
Agape love is not first a feeling. It is not first an emotion. It
is first the keeping of God's law.
* * * * * * * * * *
There are many things that people call love today, which would
never pass this test. Many things that people call love today do
not square up to God's law.
There is HOMOSEXUAL love. That is not true love because it
represents plain disobedience to God's commands.
There is "MAKING love." That is good within marriage, but outside
of that context it also represents a disrespect for God's order
of things.
There is love for the poor and oppressed. In itself also that is
good, but I have seen it lead to much HATRED for those who are in
positions of authority.
There are people who, in the name of love, will justify JEALOUSY
and SUSPICION. They make their homes a PRISON in the name of
love.
In the name of love there are people who will lie and cheat to
protect their loved ones. They would rather deny the TRUTH than
be disloyal to those whom they love.
All these are forms of love are not true agape love. And I'm sure
you could add many examples from your personal experience.
True love is not first loyalty to another human being. It is not
first a strong emotional attachment to another person. It is not
first a physical attraction to a member of the opposite sex.
TRUE love means first to obey God's commands.
* * * * * * * * * *
But love is of course so much MORE than just obedience to the
truth.
GOD'S love for us is not mechanical and impersonal. It is a
LIVELY and AFFECTIONATE love. God's love for us is WARM. It is
TENDER. The Bible says that the Lord "is ABOUNDING in love and
faithfulness." (Psalm 86:15). And this is how OUR love ought to
be towards others also.
Agape love ALSO means FONDNESS. It means TENDERNESS and
COMPASSION. It means EAGERNESS and DEVOTION.
Peter said an interesting thing to the Christians in ASIA MINOR.
He said, "Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the
truth, so that you have sincere love for your brothers," - now
that you have found genuine love by obeying the law - "love one
another DEEPLY, from the HEART." (1 Peter 1:22).
To LOVE, says Peter, means to obey the truth. And yet we should
not STOP at that. Our love should also be a DEEP and a HEARTFELT
love for our Christian brothers and sisters, and for all men.
* * * * * * * * * *
Agape love, fourthly, is an UNCONDITIONAL love. There should be
no IFS or BUTS about Christian love.
Love is the FULFILLING OF THE LAW. And the law ALWAYS applies. It
doesn't matter what your circumstances are. It doesn't matter WHO
it is you have to love. It doesn't matter what kind of MOOD you
are in. It doesn't matter what state of HEALTH you are in. True
love is always the same.
Remember again that agape love is GOD'S love THROUGH us. And
GOD'S love NEVER CHANGES.
Paul said, "Here is a trustworthy saying... If we are faithless,
He will remain faithful, for He cannot disown Himself." (2
Timothy 2:13). And he said, "God demonstrates His own love for us
in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."
(Romans 5:8).
God doesn't love us SOMETIMES as Christians. He doesn't love us
only when we meet His perfect standards. He doesn't love us only
when we walk in perfect union with Him. He loves us because we
are His CHILDREN.
And that is how OUR love ought to be for others.
It doesn't matter if your husband has not DESERVED your love
today. LOVE him all the same. It doesn't matter if your neighbour
has hurt you or offended you. LOVE him even so. It doesn't matter
if your best friend has betrayed you. SHOW him or her the love of
the Lord Jesus Christ.
God didn't wait for US to love HIM before HE loved us. And
neither should we expect others first to earn the right to
receive OUR kindness and love.
Jesus said, "Love your ENEMIES and PRAY for those who PERSECUTE
you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. (For) He
causes the sun to rise on the evil and the good and sends rain on
the righteous and the unrighteous." (Matthew 5:44-45). And He
said, "Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of
the Most High, because HE is kind to the ungrateful and wicked."
(Luke 6:35).
True, agape love is UNCONDITIONAL. There are no ifs or buts about
Christian love. It applies in every situation. THIS is the plain
spirit of the New Testament teaching.
* * * * * * * * * *
Of course, this doesn't mean that a Christian should let people
walk OVER him. The Bible teaches us also that we ought to stand
up for the truth.
God's people in the Bible didn't suffer in SILENCE. THEY didn't
give silent approval to the deeds of their persecutors. Rather
they CONFRONTED people with the WRONGFULNESS of their deeds.
JESUS taught us to turn the other cheek. But when someone struck
HIM on His cheek, He said, "If I said something wrong, TESTIFY to
what is wrong. But if I spoke the truth, then why do you STRIKE
Me?" (John 18:23).
PAUL was severely flogged for the preaching of the Good News. But
afterwards he said, "(You) beat us publicly without a trial...
and threw us into prison. And now do (you) want to get rid of us
quietly? No." (Acts 16:37).
The saints of God were not shy to state the truth. And neither
should we be today. We should love the sinner, yes. And we should
love our ENEMIES. But we should not give silent approval to their
deeds.
* * * * * * * * * *
At the same time, though, if you ever do need to speak the truth,
remember this. The Bible commands us to do it in LOVE. Paul said,
"Speak the truth in LOVE." (Ephesians 4:15). In fact it tells us,
"Do EVERYTHING in love." (1 Corinthians 16:14).
That must be one of the most difficult commandments of the Bible.
To speak the truth in love.
But that is how we ought to approach those who sin against us.
I believe it is a good thing to speak up for what is true and
right. If more people did this in their homes, in their
businesses, and in their churches, there would be a lot less
hidden resentment and a lot less misunderstanding.
* * * * * * * * * *
Now at the beginning of my sermon we saw that even in the NEW
TESTAMENT there are a NUMBER of definitions for LOVE.
Each of them has its place in your life and mine. Family
affection (storge) is GOOD. FRIENDSHIP (philia) is good.
HUMANITARIANISM (philanthropia) is good. SEXUAL LOVE (eros) is
good. These forms of love are not in any way INFERIOR to agape
love.
And yet - unless they are FILLED OUT with true, agape love, they
will be incomplete. Sometimes they will be patently EVIL. Love of
ANY kind is not love in the TRUE sense of the word until it is
UNITED with agape love.
* * * * * * * * * *
True love, therefore, begins with GOD. True love means GOD living
out His life THROUGH you. This is the only sure and lasting love
there is.
Every other form of love can fail. Love can fail in the family.
Love can fail with your partner. Love can fail with your friends.
In fact it is very LIKELY to fail if you do not know God in a
personal way.
Perhaps YOU are deeply aware today that your love has failed
towards others. Perhaps you are just afraid that it COULD.
Then ask God to come into your life by His Holy Spirit. Ask HIM
to take CONTROL. Let HIS love live through you. That is the only
guarantee you have of a true and lasting love.
AMEN.
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